Lost Coin Notes January 5, 2010

Lost Coin San Francisco is meeting on Monday nights @ 6PM.

Daniel talked about being a zombie – not bad not evil. A zombie is someone conditioned to do what others want them to do.

Daniel’s told his niece that she looked pretty. She responded that she was always pretty. Daniel didn’t think so – at a certain age she changed. Where did she get that idea? Her Mother told her. That is the way we grow up with conditioning – we are told a story by our friends, society, etc. We don’t know it is a story. They give you pleasure when you go with the story, e.g., do well in school,  and  give you pain if you don’t go along with the story. Daniel learned to discount what his parents told him – the pain they dispensed did not override the pleasure he experienced on his own. Of course, it had some consequences, like not being a good student. But when being a bad student might mean going to Vietnam – he became a better student.

Conditioning is responding to pleasure and pain on terms that we have been taught. Everyone is a little different –one got pain by not going to church, one by going too much.

But the traveler’s way is entirely different – we become our own creation instead of someone else. Maybe you were told that you should be more assertive – you decide if that is the truth. What does it really mean to be the traveler/warrior – be your own creation.  But you still remain the infinite – never separated from it – but at the same time an individual – so whose flower are you going to be? Don’t you want to be your own flower? No one should decide your flower – that is inner considering.When you were young you knew if you liked or didn’t like something. Some of that knowledge is still with us – some was crushed out of us by others. Think of all the French poets who have been beautiful failures – you are free.  Be a failure if you like. Daniel doesn’t like the word Zen Master, which has a different meaning in English from the original. The original meaning is someone who has success in the war with themselves. The way you master yourself is by kicking everyone else out of your head. You don’t have to live up to other’s standards.  

Daniel doesn’t have standards for how you should be. Precepts are helpful. When anger comes up – practice the precepts.  The Precepts are ancient – everything works better on the basis of love vs. anger. When Daniel was managing Zen Mountain Monastery, he was angry for four years because he wanted people to do things the way he wanted. Then he realized that he didn’t have to make people do things, be critical, but rather draw them closer. Don’t let people tell you who you are, don’t tell them who they are.  The Warrior/Lost Coin ethic is to be free of the Zombie nightmare that everyone is telling you what your life should be. It is your life, do what you want. Don’t tell others how to live their life. What does it mean when you can get to that point - you are the warrior/master. You get up in the morning and you decide what picture you want to paint. 

This basic idea is so difficult – you will be the one who paints the picture you want to paint – but that is the path of the traveler – you are only passing through – do what you want to do (which does not include hurting others) you are the infinite – how can the infinite be wrong?

Daniel moved to Woodstock and found he wasn’t tough enough to be free – it was a constant battle against the ideas of others. One day he was watching TV and saw a Kung Fu show and was impressed with actor’s strength and kindness – and he liked it. He seemed so free, so he studied Marshall Arts. This is the same as doing our practice – why we do our practices. It is a new year – start over – paint the picture you want to paint – if it doesn’t work out – at least you did exactly what you wanted. As a practice observe how much of what you are doing is your idea and what comes from someone else.

Look back when you were young – what was your essence? No matter what they say, they want you to be how they want you to be for their pleasure, not yours. Please yourself and you will please Daniel. This requires looking at your beliefs, “don’t put anyone else’s head above your own“, and a certain amount of confidence to live that way. Daniel doesn’t advocate being high handed or harsh – people really don’t care what you do if you are nice. People care what you do when they are afraid or angry at you.   Nobody cares that much about you – they are trapped in their own thoughts, their own stuff. But warriors are skillful – they don’t go around and slap people emotionally or otherwise.  

Compliance is not a form of affection.

It can be very threatening to others when you decide to change your life – but don’t be mad at them because what may be going on is that they don’t have the courage.  Someone else changing makes you look inside at your own doubts and work with them. It isn’t easy to do what you want.

We can coop attitudes that we were taught but that really aren’t our own. None of us are wrong – just like no flower is “wrong.” Many would like to do something different,   but don’t feel like they can – that is why we do practices to get back to the original flowers. 

How do you figure out what is conditioning? Like the conditioning that comes from growing up in a tough neighborhood.   It is very hard to free yourself from it – but it is possible.

The way we actualize love is through the precepts. Love is a very good thing, start with yourself. You can’t feel good about others if you don’t feel good yourself.

Homework:  When you get up in the morning ask yourself what picture would I like to paint, if I could really do what I wanted. Feed your own spirit.  

Daniel loves coming back to be with the SLC group.
